Here are some tips to help motivate those around you to persevere and succeed.
When gymnast Simone Biles was heading to the Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro in 2016, as favorite for the gold medal, her trainer, Aimee Boorman, noticed the increasing pressure around her.
Ms. Boorman, who was a coach -Head of the United States Women's Olympic Gymnastics Team at the time, told Ms Biles, "Look, you are not responsible for other people's expectations of you. You are only responsible for your own. own attto yourself. "
She encouraged Ms. Biles to think about how she should feel at the end of the games, regardless of whether she won: “When you get out of here after the Olympics, will you be proud of what you've done?” Giving your best is what matters most, Ms. Boorman told him.
Ms. Boorman's pep talk was concise, kind and, perhaps most importantly, successful. Ms. Biles won four gold medals and a bronze that year.
Most of us don't train Olympic athletes, but the same factors that make them help to be successful can also translate into everyday life. For example, as we move into a new phase of the pandemic, you may want to encourage those around you who are setting new goals in their personal lives. and Pprofessional.
What you tell your sister who has the courage to apply to college will be different from what you say to a team of colleagues. However, the principles of a pep talk to an individual or a group are mostly the same: there must be trust between both parties and the leader must also listen with an empathetic ear.
It is also essential that listeners see you, as the inspirer, as a leader with behavioral integrity. You have to "talk the talk," said Jacqueline Mayfield, a professor of management at Texas A&M International University who has studied motivational language for over 30 years.
Of course, there are risks in trying to motivate others. If you miss the mark or miscalculate the message, the morale effects can be damaging.eables. A a bad trainer can even increase stress levels and decrease motivation. In fact, some research shows that if people don't feel heard by their leadership at work, they are more likely to quit.
According to Dr. Mayfield's research on motivational language , effective pep talk affects three areas: the head ( giving clear directions, identifying priorities and potential rewards), heart (listening with an empathetic ear, praising knowledgethis or defending the other person) and the spirit (inspiring people, making them feel like they belong to the organization). You can customize the content of your pep talk to suit the needs of your audience.
Start with the "head " element which reads The direction. Say things like:
"Here's what you should focus on.
"Show up on time, give a firm handshake and make eye contact . "
Then pivot to the empathetic" heart "element. Say something heartwarming like:
"I'm sure you can that.
"Life has given you neck ballsrbe recently. It was tough, I know. "
Then move on to the meaningful item " mind ". Relate their actions to the bigger picture and how they can inspire others:
"Your ambition will encourage other members of our team to continue their dreams too. ”
" Your family will be so proud of you! "
Here are other ways to help others achieve their own version of the gold medal, whether it is banning the a friend's first - nervousness over dates, supporting a loved one who is making a positive change in their health, or cheering on your spouse before they go to a job interview.
Customize your message.
There is nos single message for effective pep talk. As a coach, leader or friend, it is up to you to discern which words the other person needs to hear.
" Everyone works in a different way and each has triggers that make them excel, ”said Ms Boorman, who is now an assistant coach of the Netherlands women's gymnastics team. Some athletes, she said, need a more emotional approach than others; other athletes respond better to technical corrections. Adapt your approach as needed.
Trust is essential.
" A coaching relationship does not work if there is no trust, "said Jason Pryor, a swordte who competed in the Rio de Janeiro 2016 Olympic Games and now works as a performance coach with Future, a personal training app. The most helpful pep talk he received "came from people who knew me, knew my story, knew my concerns and knew I was having a hard time," he said. Do it right, the results can be transformative: "I've seen discussions turn people into superhumans when the coach knows them and their struggles," he said.
He thanks his friends, mentors and coaches for showing him that "you can just achieve so much if you listen and help people with what they need.
Focus on what you can control.
As than an athlete, "you haveYou have no control over the score and you have no control over your placement, ”Ms. Boorman said. “You have control over your performance. "Knowing that you have done your best is what is most important.
Feeling in control of your behaviors, thoughts and emotions can do wonders for your sanity, according to a study published in the Journal of Family Psychology . Having a high sense of personal control, where you think you can shape your own life, is "linked to proactive behavior and positive psychological outcomes," the study authors said. conversely, perceived helplessness, as if your life were at the mercy of luck, fate, or the whims of powerful forces, "is associated with depression, stress andanxiety disorders. "
Focus on things that are within your abilities - the way you think and behave in a situation - will help you feel like you can take on just about any challenge.
In your role as a leader, it is crucial that you do not cross the line of encouragement under pressure or intimidation. Research shows that words and behavior are powerful. In fact, a 2018 study revealed that doctors who offering warm comfort can help relieve their patients' symptoms.
Growing up, Ms. Boorman had very strict coaches. They told her that if she didn't do well, she was going to drop her team - and her family -. She was determined to be a different coach. She said she chooses to lead with support and encouragement, not fear and intimidation.
One of the most rewarding aspects of training is seeing one of its former athletes enrolling their children in gymnastics, "because of their love for the sport, and they had such a positive experience " she said.
If you are looking to make a positive impact on others during a stressful event, consider going lighter. Sometimes brightening up the mood with a playful high-five or punch will go a long way in promoting camaraderie.
"As an athlete prepares to compete on the highest stage, coaches can legitimately make or break a situation " said Elisabeth Maier, a Canadian athlete from skeleton who competed in the 2018 Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang, South Korea.
During a recent campaign, Ms. was reprimanded by a nearby trainer who criticized her performance. Shaken, she approached her strength and conditioning trainer to let him know what had just happened. He asked her to lie down and to take 10 deep breaths. She did as he said, then continued her warm-up. She had an incredibly fast race, which saw her up five places in the standings.
Those deep, measured breaths helped her regain her momentum. And whether you were training an athlete ora friend, that's exactly what you want a great pep talk to do.